Morning Routine for the Yellow Dog Patrol

Here's the morning routine for the Yellow Dog Patrol:




Every morning Deuce the Dog heads up to the driveway for me and gets the paper. Yeah, I know it's cliché, but when it is -30F in January, sending a yellow dog on the retrieve beats the heck out of frigid walk down the driveway.

Ever since she was a pup, Deuce wanted to pick up and play with the paper, so I never did any training with her on this. She knew the word "paper" and the word "fetch," and she took my command the first time I tried it and we've been doing it every morning ever since.

While it is a pretty cool routine we have, there are times where it can get us in trouble. For example, about 5:00 AM one cold January morning we had just received a solid 10 inches of snow, and I knew I needed to clear the driveway in order for us to get out and get to work. Deuce loves the snow and was romping and playing while I concentrated on moving the snow off of the driveway. As I worked my way to the end of the driveway, I noticed that waiting for me there was a small pile of about 8 newspapers and one very happy yellow dog. In looking up, I noticed yellow dog tracks in the newly fallen snow literally all over the neighborhood. While we re-delivered papers where the prospects of a correct delivery appeared good, I know for a fact some of my neighbors did not receive their paper that morning.

Despite her affinity for others' papers, Deuce typically concentrates on just our paper. She usually returns immediately, unless she's distracted by something like a sample of Cheerios that has been included in the paper, in which case she'll get an early start on breakfast, and I'll get a shredded paper.

Overall, she does a great job. While I have a lot of animosity for the StarTribune and their editorial stances, having the yellow dog deliver it every morning adds so much fun that my subscription with them is safe. The latest sample of Fruit Roll Ups that was sent with the paper, though, is not so safe. Not at all.