A Letter to Fr. Columba

Dear Fr. Columba,

You most likely don’t remember me as I was just one hundreds of students to whom you taught Theology in the mid-1980’s. You were Br. Columba at the time, and I had hair. However, I remember you and your class like it was just a couple of years ago.

I’m not sure why, but of all the classes I took in my four years at St. John’s, yours is the one in which I have the most memories - dozens of them; all quite vivid. Everything from things like the classroom itself, to your first introduction to us (“it’s not Columbia, Columbo, or Columbus…”), your tour of the Abby Church, the red cover Bible we used, to some of your specific lectures on things like the creation stories, Peter and John’s race to the tomb, doubting Thomas and the Pentecost, the feast that is the Eucharist (especially when fasting), and our dissection of the Nicene Creed.

I’m not sure why all these stand out so clearly to me – I think I received a B in your class, I majored in management, I didn’t share the class with any friends – and you’d think I’d have remembered other classes with much more definition. But for some reason, segments of your class have stayed with me, in a very clear and noticeable way, all of these years.

One project you had us perform as part of your class was to write our own creed, and at the time I thought I took it pretty seriously. What I had developed, however, was a rework of the Nicene Creed. In scoring my paper, you told me as much, and I think you gave me a C. I was bothered about it at the time, as I felt that the Nicene Creed really matched my beliefs. If that was my creed, how could I have ended up with a C? But I think I missed the point you were looking to make.

In the years since that project, I’ve often thought back to it. What do I really believe? What truly is my creed? As my faith has bowed, flexed, and shifted, I have wrestled with those questions, and have always come back to your project. If I had to write it now and turn it in, what would it say?

So 26 years later, I feel compelled to ask: can I have a do-over? If so, I'd like to present you with my creed:

• I believe that not only is God the source of all love, but that His love of His creation is boundless. I believe as well that He deeply loves me.
• I believe that God came to live with us, teach us, and suffer a horrific and torturous death, all to reconcile ourselves to Him.
• I believe that God answers prayers. Many times, the answer is "no, but..." and the "but" part is the thing that makes all the difference. 
• I believe that God reveals Himself to me every day, even on the many days when I choose not to see Him.
• I believe that there is so much more I have to learn, and so many things I cannot understand. While things like the suffering and death of innocents, evil activities, and inequities in life call me to question God, I eventually fall back to my belief that God's will is not man's will, nor mine.
• I believe that as I shamefully lay my sins at the foot of Christ's cross, he welcomes them and offers me forgiveness that is impossible for me to fathom.
• I believe that when this life is over, through the blood of the Christ, I will be returned to God, where again I will ask forgiveness in Jesus' name, and where I will be embraced in the love that is God for eternity.
• I believe that I have an obligation to be Christ for others. While I fail at this over and over and over again, it is my obligation, and indeed what God seeks for all of us.
• Simply, I believe in God, and in his active presence in life. I believe it with every fiber of my being.

Easter blessings to you, Fr. Columba. While you and I only shared one semester, you made a deep impact on me, and I thank you for how I have been changed by that time.

Take care,


Your former student