My Shortstop from Tokyo

With sincere apologies to the gentlemen of Deep Purple...

Flys in from the Rising Sun

Need an infielder, he's the one
Yeah, he's played the position
Let's have him start

My shortstop from Tokyo

He makes an "E"
My shortstop from Tokyo
He goes oh-for-three

Talk about him like a stud

Ain't no way that he's a dud
Yeah, he's gonna make us a winner
World Series on it's way

My shortstop from Tokyo

He cannot see
My shortstop from Tokyo
The ball rolls through his knees

He's out at home and, and he just don't belong

So far away from his league 'cross the sea

Outmatched over here, he's our team's LVP

Soon we shall see just how far numbers go
From Mendoza lines to much further below

Rising from a play at two

Forgot to jump the runner who
Slid, to break up the twin killing
Ow! He got hurt

My shortstop from Tokyo

We can agree
My shortstop from Tokyo
Sucks worse than Nicky