Without Work

Last week, my job was eliminated with my employer, and my employment terminated.  Since then, life has pretty much been a mess.  First is dealing with the grief of the loss of one's job, and don't kid yourself, the grief is real.  Then there's trying to figure out what the new "everyday" is going to look like, because the previous one is history.  Finally, there's the omnipresent push/pull of "be calm, patient, and things will come together," versus "holy crap, I gotta get a job tomorrow!"

Toward that end, there is more to do than I can list, and in many ways finding a new job is much more of a job than a traditional job is.  And through it all, it is hard not to want to do EVERYTHING.  

So as I slog through this stage of my career, I'm trying to take things in chunks and not boil the ocean.  It is tough to do, as my head is swimming with great ideas of how I should be spending this unique time.  Prioritization and organization will obviously be my best friends.

But the toughest part is to not get down, which is really hard to do as little things can really set things off.  A great example was this morning, when I slept in until 6:00AM and hit the gym like I normally do, albeit a hour or two later than usual.  Things were going great until about 7:15 when there was a definite shift in the clientele.  The people with jobs were all gone, and the gym was left with a bunch of retirees.  And me.  And it made me feel like a loser.

This is but one example of the battle that is raging right now.  It's counterproductive, sapping, and about as far from objective as possible.  

It is also a dragon that I have to figure out how to slay if I'm going to get to where I need to go.